Sometimes, the smallest shifts in language can have the biggest impact—especially in difficult conversations. One of my favorites is starting a sentence with just two words: “What if…” It’s simple, but surprisingly powerful. When conversations get tense, people often...
When someone holds a hard line in a conversation (“I need this done by Friday,” “We can’t change the plan,” “That’s just how it has to be”), it’s easy to respond with our own positions. But that usually gets us stuck. If we want to navigate difficult conversations...
Many difficult conversations start with an unspoken assumption: it’s you vs. me. One person wants something. The other resists. And suddenly, you’re locked in a quiet battle of wills—both sides trying to win, rather than trying to solve the problem. One of the most...
Focusing on interests vs positions is a better way to handle difficult conversations. This might be one of the most important concepts I’ve ever learned about difficult conversations. I first came across it in Getting to Yes by Roger Fisher and William Ury, a...
In difficult conversations, sharing perspectives can dramatically lower defensiveness. Things often go sideways when one person presents their perspective as the truth. Since there can only be one truth, it creates a dynamic where disagreement is a contradiction—one...
The first few sentences of a conversation set the tone for everything that follows. If a conversation starts with hostility, it can be difficult to turn it around. I’m sure you’ve been in situations where something rubbed you the wrong way early on, and even after...
What Are KPIs (and Why Should You Care?) Key Performance Indicators (KPIs) often get a bad rap. To some, they sound like cold, top-down metrics dreamed up by “management” to monitor people. It’s easy to see how KPIs might feel impersonal—like turning real work into...
1 Alice entered the inn, her eyes locking onto Thera at one of the wooden tables. Her heart racing, she walked towards her. This was her moment, years in the making—the chance to run the Bountiful Berries store in the city. A full-fledged shop, not just a market...
Managing to Core Values has had a profound impact on my ability to place the right individuals in the right roles within my companies (getting the right people in the right seats). This wasn’t just a minor adjustment; it was a seismic shift in how we construct and...
We remember stories better than facts. Vivid stories. Powerful stories that invoke emotion. In schools we are taught how to read, write, and solve math problems. But how many classes focus on having difficult conversations, dealing with emotions, negotiating,...
Ever feel like you’re spinning your wheels? Or that you’re spending most of your time reacting to the world around you instead of paving your own path? This post on time management should help! Putting the Ladder on the Right Wall Before I can effectively manage my...
Almost all of us have a deep yearning to be understood. That being said, listening is hard. Sometimes, it can be very hard. The mental strength required to deeply listen is intense. There are times when someone else is talking and every ounce of me wants to interrupt...